one hundred percent gestation

today is volcano’s duedate, though apparently not her birthday (unless something truly dramatic happens in the next twelve hours).  I had thought that I was supposed to be physically miserable at this point, but I haven’t once found myself thinking “I am SO SICK of being pregnant.” my feet aren’t even swollen! as much as I am looking forward lying on my stomach again, I can stick it out a little longer.

still. I am ready. the funny thing is that we’re actually not ready, not the way most people seem to be before they have a full-term baby. there is no lovingly decorated nursery for volcano, although she has diapers, clothes, and a minicrib more or less ready to go. (I have to move the mickey mouse ears out of the crib, among other things.) there’s a carseat still wrapped in its plastic, hanging out in her yiayia’s closet, since we don’t have a car, or an empty closet. I’ve crossed off about half of the pre-baby to-do list, watched some youtube videos about hip-safe swaddling techniques, and officially stopped teaching until january. I’m shocked at myself for feeling this way, but that really seems good enough to me.

the other funny thing is that suddenly everyone seems compelled to tell me, “you look great!” I’m pretty sure that’s code for either “you look really pregnant!” or “are you sure you’re actually nine months already?”  depending on whether they know what I used to look like. (last year’s students saw me in the hallway in september and said, “you’re so big!” this year’s students, upon learning that my duedate was less than a month after the start of the year, said, “no! you’re too small!”) I feel like I got pretty lucky with my pregnant body, but I still think the swallowed-a-basketball look is more peculiar-looking than anything else. I haven’t really taken any deliberate belly shots, but I guess today is as good a day as any for a volcano portrait:

40wks

see, I’m trying to be chill.

I’m very grateful that, even though I am on the small side, all hand-wringing over the size of my baby has ceased. with pharmaceutical help and a lot of effort, I’ve gained a perfectly respectable amount of weight (27 pounds!), and at our forty-week appointment today the midwife leaned over my belly and said, “you’re a big girl now! time to come out!”

ready when you are, volcano.

Posted October 2nd, 2013 in volcano.

8 comments:

  1. Martha:

    I’ve been wondering how you’re doing/whether a baby has emerged yet! Good luck with everything.

  2. jennifer:

    yay rabi, exciting! thank you for sharing. best wishes for a safe delivery soon!

  3. Leah N:

    Yes, that’s definitely good enough. :) As a society we’re a little ‘baby crazy’ – the important thing isn’t that the nursery is ready, it’s that the mama is ready. And it sounds like she is.

  4. rabi:

    more than ready! let’s go, baby!

  5. Julie:

    You do look great! And you look exactly how you’re supposed to look. Great job, mama. :)
    Also, lists/getting ‘ready’: meh. I don’t think there *is* a true “ready” for baby. If you’ve got the essentials for stuff, that’s good! For me, the mental hurdle was/is by far the biggest thing, and that wasn’t something I could really get before babies were on the outside.

    Eeee, I am excited for you guys! Can’t wait to (virtually) meet Volcano! You are going to be such wonderful parents. :)

  6. Klaas:

    As one of our midwives told us the first time around, “All you really need is diapers. I slept in a drawer for my first several months.”

    Congratulations on a good long pregnancy! Maybe your outlook will be different, but for me post-due days felt like they lasted a month each.

  7. Klaas:

    Whoops, I didn’t realize I was more than a week late in reading this. Very likely something exciting has happened in the interim, though I have plenty of friends who went over by the full 10-14 days that their doctors or midwives would allow them. Either way, best of luck!

  8. tony:

    given it’s now the 26th i’m going to assume volcano has erupted… congrats!!! hope everything’s all going well for you